my aunt was a hospice nurse. she would drive past the hospitals she used to work at and the neighborhoods of friends who have since passed and she would tell me about her work. she would tell me about the ways she would advocate for best quality of life for her dying patients, her experiences in therapy both because of her job and because of her brother's suicide, the child she met with every weekend for years to provide emotional support that her mom couldn't.
my aunt was a good catholic. she's honestly the only person i can think of who ever truly embodied christ in their faith. she was always so loving and so understanding. she would love you for all your flaws and she wouldn't judge you for anything, even though that was hard for her to do when i would play the screamo songs i liked for her that she absolutely could not stand. she never made a big deal out of me coming out, never treated me different for having a girlfriend. she treated me the same as she treated her straight daughter or anyone else. when i started dating my girlfriend i wanted to tell her all about her very excited and she said "don't tell me anything about her, not even her name, until you've been together for at least a month."
my aunt was very wise. we watched documentaries together in her living room while my uncle fell asleep on the couch of the sunroom with a baseball game still on the tv. i need to call him soon. i haven't talked to him since her funeral.
she always got a pinot grigio with her meal when we went out. she rarely ever finished the whole thing, would just slowly nurse on it before and during her meal. her soft hands were always painted, and her wrists often adorned with glass jewelry - she had a friend who made hand blown glass jewelry and art pieces. she would take me around town to glass art galleries, or to a friend she used to work in hospice with who now owns an art and music center with her wife and friend. she drove me past their house, decorated in every color imaginable, with incredibly detailed art made with assorted recycled materials. she told me about her friend's artwork in the bellagio, and that it's all over the world. whenever she took me to see one of her friends, they were always so happy to see her. she was an incredible conversationalist and an incredible listener and was so amazing at making you feel like the only thing in the world grabbing her attention at the moment.
she was close friends with her neighbors and every year they would decorate her house for christmas for her. their own light displays were super elaborate. they were an artsy couple. my aunt loved artsy people. she was so much fun to go to museums with. she was so knowledgeable and interested in art, and in people. she was the kind of person to make friends everywhere she went. she would take me to aquariums and tell me about how florida has changed over her lifetime with all the plastic pollution and waste and the measures different people were taking to better conditions for florida wildlife. she would explain red tide to me after i picked her up from driving her minivan a couple of blocks because the red tide made it hard for her to breathe. she always took me out to such good places to eat, lots of seafood places on the beach, italian restaurants, and irish pubs. she would buy me gelato to sample and would throw a fit when we went to an italian restaurant and they were out of calamari cause she knew that was my favorite.
she would keep my secrets safe with her, and she was the only family member i felt like i could talk to about anything. every day i wish i could call her again. every day i wish i could tell her about what's happening to me, ask her for advice, tell her i love her and how important she is to me.